Being a parent isn't a Pampers advert...
1. I don't have to go to Rhyme-time and Sing-A-Long bollocks. Meeting a friend and their baby in the pub, having a glass of wine and a proper chat is far more helpful and enjoyable.*
2. Following Insta-Mums, and weaning "experts" on social media isn't helpful. You only end up feeling like you could more when you're already doing everything you can.
3. You're the expert on your baby and your body. Don't let anyone else tell you how you should lose weight or what your baby needs.
4. Second babies aren't automatically easier. Don't ever say that to anyone, ever.
5. Elder siblings do adapt really well though, you'll wonder what you worried about and you'll be so proud of how well they do and how quickly they learn to share you.
6. If you have a partner in all this, take care of that relationship. Don't take it for granted because there'll be a period where you're under so much stress with so little sleep it's really easy to forget you love each other...
7. Having three cats and two kids is fucking mental. Don't do it.
8. Always have a supply of fish fingers/potato waffles/chicken nuggets in the freezer. Ignore the haters.
9. Being a mum is a part of who I am but not all of who I am. My kids get a lot of me but not all of me - make time for you and do the things you enjoy. Even if that's sitting on the sofa in your pants** drinking a glass of pinot and eating a whole sharing bag of Doritos.
10. Some days you will win and some days you will lose but everyday your kid will love you and think you're their absolute world. Even if they're screaming I DON'T LIKE IT at the top of their lungs and throwing their Lightening McQueen toy car at your face. Bless 'em...
* Disclaimer - some of these groups are actually really lovely and we do have fun...sometimes. Sometimes though, no one talks to you and you feel like you're the fat kid not getting picked for the netball team. So I've heard...
**I don't ever just sit in my pants but fully respect those that do.
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